mindyourlanguagefandomcom-20200214-history
The First Lesson
"The First Lesson" is the first episode of the first season of Mind Your Language. It was first broadcast on the 30th of December 1977. Plot Ali Nadim gets directions to the classroom from Dolores Courtney. He heads off for room 5 which is where the English As A Foreign Language Class is held but on the way out he bumps into Jeremy Brown. As Ali heads off Mr. Brown enters and introduces himself to Miss Courtney. She gives him the job on a month's trial. He then goes to the classroom to ask the students their names, nationalities and occupations. Ali and Ranjeet insult each other and Giovanni and Max argue over Danielle, both a sign of things to come. Quotes * Ali: Like it say in your silly bus. * Ali: I am not going where I am looking. * Jeremy Brown: No, no. I wasn't looking where I was going. * Ali: That makes the two of us. Excuse me sir. * Miss Courtney: I am referring to the fact that you are a man. I distinctly requested the Local Authority to send me a woman teacher especially in view of what happened with Mr. Warburton. * Mr. Brown: Mr. Warburton? * Miss Courtney: Yes. He was teaching English to foreign students last term. I'm afraid he only lasted a month and then he departed. * Mr. Brown: Dead? * Miss Courtney: Demented. Yes, the strain was too much for him. Typical of the male sex. No stamina. Oh he seemed to be able to cope at first but then one day he just snapped. It was really quite disgusting. * Mr. Brown: Really? What did he do? * Miss Courtney: Climbed out of the classroom window on to the roof, took off all his clothes and stood there stark naked singing "I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts". * Mr. Brown: How distressing! Well uh there's no need to worry on my account, I'm not likely to climb out of the classroom window. * Miss Courtney: I know you aren't. * Mr. Brown: Thank you for your confidence. * Miss Courtney: It's got nothing to do with confidence. We've had the window frames nailed down. *Mr. Brown: I am brown. * Ali: Oh no. You are committing a mistake. * Mr. Brown: Mistake? * Ali: Yes please. You are not brown, we are brown. You are white. *Mr. Brown: Ah yes, what is your name? * Student: Maximillian Andrea Archimedes Papandrious. * Mr. Brown: I think I'll just put you down as Max. I take it you're Greek? * Max: Is right. From Athens. * Mr. Brown: And what is your job? * Max: I walk with sheeps. * Mr. Brown: You walk with sheeps? A shepherd? You work on a farm? * Max: Ah no no not farm. * Mr. Brown: But you said you work with sheep. * Max: No no no no sheeps. Big sheeps. (Makes bullhorn sounds.) * Mr. Brown: Ships. Trivia *This is the only episode where neither Gladys nor Sid appear. Videos External links * 's IMDb page Category:Season 1 Episodes